if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
be right there i have to get my cape
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
