there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
