You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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