Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!

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(314): View more from Missouri

I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.

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(757): View more from Virginia

Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'

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(970): View more from Colorado

You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day

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(586): View more from Michigan

My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.

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(719): View more from Colorado

I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Can I chase this vodka with an onion?

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(303): View more from Colorado

We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.

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