I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Still dying that you shit outside
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
