turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
