Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
