you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
