New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize