I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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