It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
My vagina is very pro this idea
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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