U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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