it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
