No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
