Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize