its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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