i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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