I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
This is my gift to your gina
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
