But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
