My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Randomize
