Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
