She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Randomize
