so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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