You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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