He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
