worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
