Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Enjoy the penises
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
