mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
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