i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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