I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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