You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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