Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
