He kissed a someone with a penis
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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