We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
