im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
