yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
