Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
