the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
These People Are So Awkward You’ll Get Embarrassed
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
These People Encountered Celebrities in Bizarrely Normal Places
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.