Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Its about making memories worth repressing
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Randomize
