I bet he comes in French.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
