I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize