He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
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Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
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She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
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