so explain again why im purple
no
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
