I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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