please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
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