I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
