i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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