sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
