Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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