I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
